Why non-acceptance of the LGBT community can lead to internalised homophobia

When I was in high school, an effeminate boy earned quite a reputation for himself entertaining people. Yet I once accidentally overheard him wishing before making merit, "Please, in the next life, let me be a straight guy or a straight girl". I was so surprised! He seemed so confident in his effeminate ways and appeared to enjoy his life yet he still wished to be straight.

But there again, his prayers are not so very difficult to understand as in this world which denies anything non-heterosexual, LGBT people always face homophobic attitudes. We are labelled with negative terms, such as "perverts", "abominations" or even "sinners" by families, religions and societies.

In Thai-Buddhist tradition, we have the "bad karma" discourse. We're told that bad sexual conduct in past lives have made us "deviant". Thai society also tries to ban homosexuals from ordination, in effect secluding gay people from high moral values. Little surprise then that many LGBT grow up with kind of self-depreciation that could lead to "internalised homophobia" - prejudices against aspects of homosexuality inside the LGBT themselves.

For example, we may laugh at hearing offensive gay jokes, without realising that is a kind of abuse, that we are in fact laughing at some aspects of ourselves. Some LGBT deny their true nature and try to live heterosexually by getting married. They end up hurting their spouses and children.

Internalised homophobia can be tackled by education with more open attitude towards human sexuality or, in serious cases, "affirmative therapy" that helps gay people regain their self-esteem. Although we don't have to be too "proud" of ourselves, we need, at the very least, to accept who we are. Victor J. Seidler, the author of "Rediscovering Masculinity" said, "In denying aspects of ourselves, we are denying our power". When we lose our power, the anti-gay movement will bring us down. Don't let them.